Where would I be now? 

      About twelve years ago I had this idea to change one behavior a week in my routine with the goal of losing weight. It made total sense to me, surely I am capable of changing one thing a week. Making small changes would be easy I told myself. Yet, I wasn't patient enough to follow my own advice. Instead, as each new year approached (like any old tomorrow wouldn't do just fine) I would come up with a grandiose plan which often included, but not limited to the following: make a commitment to walk a half hour every day, limit my calorie intake to 1,200 calories daily, drink eight glasses of water, give up diet soda, give up candy, join the YMCA, walk my dog, give up potatoes and bread, throw out all the clothes that were too big or currently fit me  in my closet (because God knows there is everything in there from size 10-size 2X), take aqua-size classes,  join a weight support group at church, join an organized weight-loss meeting, etc, etc, etc. I can tell you that most of those ideas never came to fruition. One year I followed through for three weeks and fell off the wagon when friends came to town. The majority of  my ideas were dead in the water. Just a flash in my mind, with little to no follow through. It was too much. It was too constricting. My excuses were endless. I guess I didn't want to change that badly or that much. 

    Twelve years have passed and I'm still here, still getting older, still enjoying my life the best I can, but it gets more difficult with each passing year and each pound gained. As for the passing of time, it's something I cannot avoid. We all get older and eventually. Our bodies will move slower and illness and accidents will make life even more difficult in our supposed "Golden Years." So, that's that. However, over a decade has passed and I am much worse off than I could have been. What if  I would have chosen to make one small change a week? What if I hadn't given in to what I thought were quick fixes and instantaneous results? What if I had followed through with a plan for me made by me that was made up of little changes, one every week for a calendar year? Where would I have been at the end of that first year? And the big question, where would I be now? 

    It took a life time. I'm not slower learner. I am stubborn. But I'm finally ready to give up these ideas that I've had that there is an easier and faster way to change me. I'm ready to to embrace the idea that slow and steady wins the race. I remember an episode of  Dr. Phil once when he said something to the effect of, "Another year will pass whether you do something about it or not." I don't want to be filled with guilt and regret knowing I wasted yet another year when the ball drops in New York City announcing 2022...I am going to be in a better place.